Has anyone ever said this to you? How does it make you feel? Honestly this is one phrase that makes me "mad as hell."
Upon moving from 2035 F to 2147 F our Program inherited a new mailman. At the previous address our mail person was a woman. Whenever she would come into the office we would for a few minutes before she gathered our mail. During Christmas I even bought a sweet potato pie from her. No big deal, right?
My behavior towards our current mail carrier is not any different. I decided, even though he is a man, I would still be friendly. Knowing men can often confuse kindness with interest, I tried to limit conversation to safe topics, i.e., food, sports, etc. Despite all my precautions, I have won the affection of our mail carrier, whose name I don't even remember.
Every time he comes into the office he confides that "my stop" is his favorite and he "always saves the best for last." Whatever that means. At first I believed the flirtation was harmless but this week he has tried to ask me out twice. Not good.
Then yesterday evening this comes out of his mouth, "I can't believe you're leaving. You have just ruined my day. We should go to lunch sometime. YOU OWE ME."
I am sure, if asked, he would probably not remember having uttered such a blasphemous oath. Despite any protestation he could offer, the truth remains. A man told me I owed him and sadly he is not the first to say this. What makes men or anyone, for that matter, say such a thing? I owe my parents everything and they have never said that. OK. My mom may have alluded that I owe her something for the hours of hard labor she endured to bring me into this world but my dad has never even implied such a thing. Yet, a man, whose name I don't even remember, tells me I owe him?!
No matter what people do for me I shouldn't owe them anything. People are kind and giving because they choose to be. I don't do things for the sake of getting something in return. I give because I want to. My actions are motivated by love or respect, sometimes both. There is no alterior motive driving my actions. So, why, if someone does something kind for me, should I owe them something? I have never understood that mentality. Perhaps someone could explain it to me.